Therapist explains sex

In a world where divorce seems as common as catching a cold, one woman is doing her bit to help couples and individuals to identify, talk about, and nip relationship issues in the bud.

Sex therapist Bettina Arndt’s first book, The Sex Diaries, explored the difficulties couples can encounter when they have mismatched levels of desire, through the experiences of 98 couples who kept diaries for her research.

Her latest book, What Men Want, explores how men negotiate affection, the lengths and risks they go to for sex, and even exploring the “age of Viagra”.

Again, through the eyes of real people, in this case more than 100 men who supplied diaries, Ms Arndt reveals what they really feel in certain situations, such as having to pop the little blue pills, and facing impotence after prostate cancer treatments.

While these are all quite private issues, it’s important for people to discuss them – at least with their partner. “It’s very important to be able to talk,” Ms Arndt said.

“When things are going well it’s easy for a couple to be having sex and not talking about it. But when you run into problems, it can mean one or both partners are unable to talk about it.”

She said humour made it easier to talk about the subject.

Bettina Arndt will be presenting, selling and signing copies of her new book What Men Want at North West Expo’s Cocktail Party and The Pink Tent on Saturday May 7 from 3pm.